The rut is a special time of year for a deer hunter. It brings rednecks out of the woodwork and into any deer camp that will offer them an invite. For me, and I imagine a lot of y’all, it’s a time to reconnect with old friends and family at deer camp and make new acquaintances every year.
Heck, I remember showing up to the cabin as a kid and my dad saying, “Jeff, meet Ned. He is a cousin of your mom’s mom’s hairdresser down in Macon.” Random rednecks were always showing up and after a few years of this, I became fluent in a new language that I only heard around deer camp. Below are some words you might hear this year around the campfire depending on how redneck your deer camp is.
If people at your deer camp are rednecks, you might hear or want to use these words:
Accustom (ə-ˈkəs-təm), n. and v. To have verbally abused more than one person with a profanity. “Two trespassers were sitting in my blind this morning, so I accustom out.”
Adequate (a-dǝ-kwit), n. and v. To have acted with the intention of terminating one’s condition of employment. “If my boss didn’t give me the first week of November off, adequate!”
Afar (ə-ˈfär), n. An object in a state of combustion. “There was afar on the north ridge this morning cuz grandpa fell asleep in his stand while smoking again.”
Asthma (ˈaz-mə) v. To make an inquiry to a person of familiar acquaintance. “I don’t know if I can bet my wedding ring on this poker hand. Lemme call and asthma wife.”
Dairy (ˈder-ē), v. and n. The audacity or bravery of a male. “With that spike Ted shot, how dairy say something about my 6-point being small.”
Infamy (in-fa-mē) adv. and n. Another person’s intent to exact punishment. “Ever since I shot that buck out of season, the DNR has had it infamy.”
Iraq (i-räk) n. The presence of antlers. “I saw 20 deer this morning, but not one of ’em had Iraq.”
Kilowatt (ki-lə-wät), v. and n. Interrogative as to the specific identity of an intended animal, with the objective of ending its life. “Tell me one more time: we’re going out in the middle of the night to kilowatt?”
Marshal (mär-shəl), n. and v. A prediction concerning the future state of a wetland. “Be careful walking across the swamp on the way to your stand. That marshal swallow your boots right up.”
All jokes aside, I hope you have a great time at deer camp, see a lot of deer and most importantly, have fun with those close to you!